My body is a bomb—a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. This thought moves through me daily. I hear the ticking. I feel the ticking. I don’t know when it will explode.
How do you live in a body that is the site of so many crime scenes?
You clean up each mess, but there is always residue that remains. You can never scrub it to what it was before. That doesn’t exist anymore. The thing is, you’re not dirty—even if you feel like you are. You’re just a slightly different shape than you were and this new shape needs getting used to; needs feeling into. This new shape is ripe like a bruise. And even though a person (or people) created this new shape for you without your consent, it is still you; it’s not them or what they did to you.
You are now a shapeshifter. You own your shapes; however many there might be (there will be many).
There is no bomb inside you. No bombs were left at those crime scenes. The bomb you feel is memory; it can’t hurt you. It is within you, but it is not you. You are responding to your new shape.
Your heart is the same one you were born with. Its beat is limitless. You stay curious, and wonder which new shape you might become next.
Your heart still dances amidst the bomb threats.
🎉 Mood Board for the Week
If You're Tired All The Time, It's Not Your Fault -
That Bioré Pore Strip School Shooting Ad -
This book sounds lovely
This art is awesome
How to show up for yourself (with daily non-negotiable practices) -
Sitting in cold, dark rooms since summer SAD is in full swing (and because of all the air quality alerts, which make me weep for our earth)
Book writing in a new direction (the direction I originally wanted)
Gua sha (I think I have a knot in my forehead, and it’s slightly loosening!), somatic therapy, attending to all things me
✨Reminders✨
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“You are now a shapeshifter.” Thank you ❤️ for all of it, but especially those words- I really needed them today