Who You're Leaving Out

When you say "you can't build community online"

✨Reminders✨

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I continue to hear and read some iteration of: “You can’t build community in online spaces.” To no one’s surprise, I full-heartedly disagree with this, and I’ll tell you why.

Hint: ableism. So much ableism.

When I first created Guerrilla Feminism in 2011, I envisioned a space for folks to gather online who would then meet offline to attend protests and marches. What happened instead was people wanted to stay online to collaborate and seek support. It was more convenient. In my own internet upbringing, I, too, found various online support spaces where I felt I belonged and where I had community. I know that I am not the only person to feel this way and to have this experience.

When we denigrate online spaces and say they can’t be opportunities for community-building, we are actively excluding some of the most marginalized people in our society. It’s no wonder that disabled people continue to be forgotten about or pushed aside throughout the pandemic (which is still very much ongoing). People who are home-bound, bed-bound, or just can’t make it to in-person meetings/hangouts/etc need and deserve community. Who is anyone to say that online spaces cannot exist as community building?

Many of us Millennials who grew up in the both/and of not having internet access to then having internet access know that community building can happen in online spaces, because we’ve experienced it. Many of us have “online friends” who we’ve known for a decade or more. How could that happen if online spaces didn’t exist as potential sites of community building?

When I see the push to return to in-person everything, I question whether people learned anything from this pandemic. So much was moved to virtual initially, only for it to be taken away the second abled people were “done” caring (if they ever cared to begin with). If we are truly committed to inclusion (which, I’m not sure many abled people are), then why aren’t we listening to disabled people? Why are we saying that community-building can only happen in-person? Why do we act as though the internet is not IRL (in real life)?

I personally do not separate my online life from my offline life. I am the same person online as I am offline. I know some people need this separation for safety reasons. However, what I need people to understand is that “IRL” is both online and off. Online life is not fake or less-than. When we talk like it is, we do an incredible disservice to those whose lives might look vastly different from ours. We do an incredible disservice to online communities that include very real people. This isn’t the internet of the 90s—so much can (and IS) happening online. There isn’t much of a separation anymore, and that’s a good thing in a lot of ways.

We have already lost so many people, specifically disabled people, to Covid. Let’s not continue to lose any more valuable perspectives just because abled folks think community-building can only happen in-person.

If you are someone who doesn’t yet have a disability, you might someday. Now might be a good time to start thinking about how you will respond when told there is only an in-person option for something you would like to do.

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🫀 Mood Board for the Week

1. I’m not a “Swiftie,” but I’m also not not a Swiftie, ya know?

2. I’ve been enjoying the cooler days here in the midwest, though a heatwave is coming, so please pray.

3. I purchased a neck fan to possibly help with any vasovagal syncope moments.

4. I also purchased some super cute compression socks to also help with VS stuff.

5. Art and Resistance Across the US-Mexico Borderlands

6. Reading the Practice Magic series because it makes me think of fall.

7. Donate to the Maui Food Bank!

8. The ultra-rich depend on a global network of lawyers, accountants, administrators, and other fixers to protect their wealth from taxation.

9. In Defense of Documenting Life -

   Healing Field Notes

10. I am re-publishing my 2015 book of poems. I will link when it’s available!