I’ve only been on SSRIs for around 4 years now and I’ve had many changes to my treatment but only a few days ago, I had an awful crisis day and I believe withdrawal from my meds were the main reason.
It was not a controlled decision or even something I wanted to do.
I have ADHD and BPD and I didn’t manage to go get my meds on time so for 3 days I didn’t have the appropriate dosage + 1 day I didn’t have/take any cuz I was out of them
Well, my body and mind got ducked up in a very unpleasant way, like vertigo and nausea and a headache, all which are symptoms I’m very familiar with but they were heightened and like pulsating waves all throughout my body
I’m also not in a place yet where I can have my own home and a place to fully let my emotions be released when I need and that day I know I needed to cry and HARD
Like wailing crying
But because I still live with my family, I’m very uncomfortable with it I felt stuck/a blockage inside me
I got through it and managed to fix another med shortage issue (my adhd meds are often out of stock or on shortage)
I feel much better now and I feel like the days ahead are more hopeful after just a few days
I guess what I mean to say is I felt deeply how much everything in me relied on these medications, I don’t even have a job or a family to care for etc
I get a disability pension and I’m gonna look into other aid in my city bc without it I can’t really save up a lot and I plan on moving out into my own home when it’s possible 😊
I know lots of my other disabled friends are also only just now finding out what treatment works for them and I think we’re all fucking trying and exhausted
But the world is so dysfunctional that needing meds to stay stable enough or survive is just where I’m at currently and I think we are awfully having a completely normal appropriate reaction to a very stressful violent and unfair environment
I’m lucky enough that I found a very involved, respectful and caring psychiatrist so I can always talk about my pov and suggest reducing or augmenting meds, we talk and we decide together
I think losing cognitive abilities is super scary; probably one of my biggest fears as I feel like it’s been happening as I finally started implementing treatments and changes, doing concrete things for my healing journey which is gonna be a lifelong process and I feel like I’ve only just started to get some answers/help/ appropriate priorities
My window of tolerance is much « lower » than before bc I actually feel things now
But I’m also more capable and have agency over my life!
So I believe you can explore the direction of maybe slowly reducing SSRI meds with your psychiatrist for example
Maybe choosing a period that is a little less overwhelming or where you have more support around you
Going slow I believe is best and then going at your pace, whatever it may be
I think since I’ve had more appropriate treatment for only around 2 years, I still have the mindset of « I might need meds my whole life, I’ve tried a ton and only just find what works for me, I’m not eager to stop or scared of a life on medication forever, I’m disabled and I don’t have enough money to afford the comfort in life that I feel would make it even bearable without meds »
But I’m also not closed off to the idea of someday reducing or even stopping taking them if I don’t need to anymore, especially if they’re causing other issues
That seems like maybe that’s your situation right now
It seems really hard and frightening, I hope you can decide with your psychiatrist (that is respectful and that you trust hopefully) and, little by little, can see how to change safely and adapt to those changes with other people supporting you too
That’s my opinion and what I think would help
However, only do what makes sense for you and I hope you’ll navigate this transition period in a way that feels right for you 💖
(I wrote this shortly after waking up so sleepy brain still, take it all with a grain a salt haha, maybe I could have articulated it better
But this is good enough to me rn :b
I hope my insight can be useful to you or resonate in some way)
It makes me so angry that so many of us will never get to simply *exist* in the world without having to medicate ourselves to the point of “normalcy” (whatever that is). I, too, am on SSRIs. I haven’t been on them consistently over the years, but they’ve been a constant for me since having a baby during the pandemic. Thanks to meds and therapy, I was doing so much better, both mentally and physically (remote work, more exercise, etc). Now we’re back to “normal” and I’m struggling all over again. Anyway, your book came in the mail the other day and I can’t wait to dig in! 🩶
Hi LACHRISTA .I read your post and first I will start off with I was only on that med a week made me suicidal . Yet you Caught me when I am coming off or trying too Kolonopin After being on it 35 years . Is it very addicting yes am i going through hell yes ,But thats me .What made me decide to try to get off Kolonopin . I saw many articles about prolonged use of this med causing everything from memory loss , To kidney disease , To heart troubles to name a few .Since i started having memory problems two years ago at time i never thought it was the ssri . Drs did scans and said indeed it most likely is .Here I am in second week still going through rough withdrawal ,But not feeling the panic and ptsd i have had for 50 years .So to me having watched friends come off hard illegal drugs , I am sure this will pass .Anyone on ssri's that have been on them even 20 or 10 years should talk to a dr about coming off slowly .Some drs and psychiatrists ere taught wrong trust me on that .Just turn to ssri's and don't really listen to the problem .I hope you can come off it and it isn't like my withdrawal has been , Yet I truly believe your strong and can do it . Hugs and peace to you
I’m currently researching ssri’s for one of my kids with depressive symptoms. Is this a possibility? I’d hate to start something and then have it not available. Getting him stable is my main concern.
I was researching the Walsh protocol this morning and they have 30 years of experience with treating mental illness with nutrients. It’s more science than it sounds. Anyway, on the podcast I was listening to with dr Walsh he said he never takes people off their meds. They use nutrients in congruence with them. Then adjust slowly later and monitor.
I tend to research everything and then make a fully informed choice. It’s daunting when the brain is being treated because what if they get it wrong?
Hi Sara-- I've never heard about the Walsh Protocol. I want to say that I am 100 percent pro-meds, but yes, it's difficult because shit can be wrong/incorrect and some of us were not told the full information OR we're only just now finding more/new info out.
Yeah that’s what I am learning, nutrition, holistic etc can be equally harmful and that’s what I’m finding so frustrating.
I hope you are able to find what you need.
I remember during Covid I wasn’t able to get my thyroid meds. So I turned to functional medicine thinking it would help- and it did but only because she tested me for thyroid antibodies, I had been being treated for hashimotos but I lacked the gene markers. 😂
It turned out I had a different condition not even thyroid related.
Hi Lachrista!
I’ve only been on SSRIs for around 4 years now and I’ve had many changes to my treatment but only a few days ago, I had an awful crisis day and I believe withdrawal from my meds were the main reason.
It was not a controlled decision or even something I wanted to do.
I have ADHD and BPD and I didn’t manage to go get my meds on time so for 3 days I didn’t have the appropriate dosage + 1 day I didn’t have/take any cuz I was out of them
Well, my body and mind got ducked up in a very unpleasant way, like vertigo and nausea and a headache, all which are symptoms I’m very familiar with but they were heightened and like pulsating waves all throughout my body
I’m also not in a place yet where I can have my own home and a place to fully let my emotions be released when I need and that day I know I needed to cry and HARD
Like wailing crying
But because I still live with my family, I’m very uncomfortable with it I felt stuck/a blockage inside me
I got through it and managed to fix another med shortage issue (my adhd meds are often out of stock or on shortage)
I feel much better now and I feel like the days ahead are more hopeful after just a few days
I guess what I mean to say is I felt deeply how much everything in me relied on these medications, I don’t even have a job or a family to care for etc
I get a disability pension and I’m gonna look into other aid in my city bc without it I can’t really save up a lot and I plan on moving out into my own home when it’s possible 😊
I know lots of my other disabled friends are also only just now finding out what treatment works for them and I think we’re all fucking trying and exhausted
But the world is so dysfunctional that needing meds to stay stable enough or survive is just where I’m at currently and I think we are awfully having a completely normal appropriate reaction to a very stressful violent and unfair environment
I’m lucky enough that I found a very involved, respectful and caring psychiatrist so I can always talk about my pov and suggest reducing or augmenting meds, we talk and we decide together
I think losing cognitive abilities is super scary; probably one of my biggest fears as I feel like it’s been happening as I finally started implementing treatments and changes, doing concrete things for my healing journey which is gonna be a lifelong process and I feel like I’ve only just started to get some answers/help/ appropriate priorities
My window of tolerance is much « lower » than before bc I actually feel things now
But I’m also more capable and have agency over my life!
So I believe you can explore the direction of maybe slowly reducing SSRI meds with your psychiatrist for example
Maybe choosing a period that is a little less overwhelming or where you have more support around you
Going slow I believe is best and then going at your pace, whatever it may be
I think since I’ve had more appropriate treatment for only around 2 years, I still have the mindset of « I might need meds my whole life, I’ve tried a ton and only just find what works for me, I’m not eager to stop or scared of a life on medication forever, I’m disabled and I don’t have enough money to afford the comfort in life that I feel would make it even bearable without meds »
But I’m also not closed off to the idea of someday reducing or even stopping taking them if I don’t need to anymore, especially if they’re causing other issues
That seems like maybe that’s your situation right now
It seems really hard and frightening, I hope you can decide with your psychiatrist (that is respectful and that you trust hopefully) and, little by little, can see how to change safely and adapt to those changes with other people supporting you too
That’s my opinion and what I think would help
However, only do what makes sense for you and I hope you’ll navigate this transition period in a way that feels right for you 💖
(I wrote this shortly after waking up so sleepy brain still, take it all with a grain a salt haha, maybe I could have articulated it better
But this is good enough to me rn :b
I hope my insight can be useful to you or resonate in some way)
Appreciate all of this so much. Thank you for sharing!
It makes me so angry that so many of us will never get to simply *exist* in the world without having to medicate ourselves to the point of “normalcy” (whatever that is). I, too, am on SSRIs. I haven’t been on them consistently over the years, but they’ve been a constant for me since having a baby during the pandemic. Thanks to meds and therapy, I was doing so much better, both mentally and physically (remote work, more exercise, etc). Now we’re back to “normal” and I’m struggling all over again. Anyway, your book came in the mail the other day and I can’t wait to dig in! 🩶
YES! Exactly, Amanda!
Hi LACHRISTA .I read your post and first I will start off with I was only on that med a week made me suicidal . Yet you Caught me when I am coming off or trying too Kolonopin After being on it 35 years . Is it very addicting yes am i going through hell yes ,But thats me .What made me decide to try to get off Kolonopin . I saw many articles about prolonged use of this med causing everything from memory loss , To kidney disease , To heart troubles to name a few .Since i started having memory problems two years ago at time i never thought it was the ssri . Drs did scans and said indeed it most likely is .Here I am in second week still going through rough withdrawal ,But not feeling the panic and ptsd i have had for 50 years .So to me having watched friends come off hard illegal drugs , I am sure this will pass .Anyone on ssri's that have been on them even 20 or 10 years should talk to a dr about coming off slowly .Some drs and psychiatrists ere taught wrong trust me on that .Just turn to ssri's and don't really listen to the problem .I hope you can come off it and it isn't like my withdrawal has been , Yet I truly believe your strong and can do it . Hugs and peace to you
I’m currently researching ssri’s for one of my kids with depressive symptoms. Is this a possibility? I’d hate to start something and then have it not available. Getting him stable is my main concern.
I was researching the Walsh protocol this morning and they have 30 years of experience with treating mental illness with nutrients. It’s more science than it sounds. Anyway, on the podcast I was listening to with dr Walsh he said he never takes people off their meds. They use nutrients in congruence with them. Then adjust slowly later and monitor.
I tend to research everything and then make a fully informed choice. It’s daunting when the brain is being treated because what if they get it wrong?
Hi Sara-- I've never heard about the Walsh Protocol. I want to say that I am 100 percent pro-meds, but yes, it's difficult because shit can be wrong/incorrect and some of us were not told the full information OR we're only just now finding more/new info out.
Yeah that’s what I am learning, nutrition, holistic etc can be equally harmful and that’s what I’m finding so frustrating.
I hope you are able to find what you need.
I remember during Covid I wasn’t able to get my thyroid meds. So I turned to functional medicine thinking it would help- and it did but only because she tested me for thyroid antibodies, I had been being treated for hashimotos but I lacked the gene markers. 😂
It turned out I had a different condition not even thyroid related.
Is anybody well? Ya know.