I don't handle illness well. I used to, as a kid, but something about capitalism stuck it in my brain that rest is failing, actually, and it's been a decade-long process of unlearning the idea that my body doesn't deserve care and that I don't have to apologise for being unwell.
I am grateful to have a Buddhist practice that consistently reminds me to hold compassion for the self, alongside compassion for others ("Oh yeah, when you said May ALL BEINGS be free...that includes you, numpty!") and that my partner reminds me that I do not have to "prove" my worth through productivity. Also, reading the poem Wild Geese by Mary Oliver. The whole thing, but particularly the opening verse. It is a solid reminder that I deserve to just be, and to be sometimes means I am sick and when I am sick it is the best reminder to take care of this particular being.
I try to model what I learn for others too. To use illness as a reminder that we have been convinced we need to move at a pace that is untenable, and that being unwell can really highlight how interconnected we are. I connect with others who have the same unpredictable condition as me, to commiserate and share resources.
I am getting better at being sick. It may seem a strange aspiration to hold, but I recognize how noble it is. Particularly that as long as we are fortunate enough to have long lives, we will all ultimately be called to care for ourselves (and accept care) better with each passing year.
Wow lady...please feel better...I'm not very good with medical issues of facilities....between the gen anxiety and phobias, triggers, its hard......deep breath in....
I don't handle illness well. I used to, as a kid, but something about capitalism stuck it in my brain that rest is failing, actually, and it's been a decade-long process of unlearning the idea that my body doesn't deserve care and that I don't have to apologise for being unwell.
I am grateful to have a Buddhist practice that consistently reminds me to hold compassion for the self, alongside compassion for others ("Oh yeah, when you said May ALL BEINGS be free...that includes you, numpty!") and that my partner reminds me that I do not have to "prove" my worth through productivity. Also, reading the poem Wild Geese by Mary Oliver. The whole thing, but particularly the opening verse. It is a solid reminder that I deserve to just be, and to be sometimes means I am sick and when I am sick it is the best reminder to take care of this particular being.
I try to model what I learn for others too. To use illness as a reminder that we have been convinced we need to move at a pace that is untenable, and that being unwell can really highlight how interconnected we are. I connect with others who have the same unpredictable condition as me, to commiserate and share resources.
I am getting better at being sick. It may seem a strange aspiration to hold, but I recognize how noble it is. Particularly that as long as we are fortunate enough to have long lives, we will all ultimately be called to care for ourselves (and accept care) better with each passing year.
I hope you keep taking good care of yourself and feel better soon! <3
Thanks Caitlin!
Wow lady...please feel better...I'm not very good with medical issues of facilities....between the gen anxiety and phobias, triggers, its hard......deep breath in....
Thanks Debra <3
Thank you, Chanél!